So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
