Well douche your snatch and let's go!
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Randomize
