so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Randomize
