New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize