Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
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