My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize