a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.