what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
you will always have a special place in my vag
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
