never play flip cup with pint glasses
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
