Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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