All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
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