I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize