Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
it's like iHOP with fire
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!