I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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