If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
His nipple licking is glorious
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