Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
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