pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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