I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize