Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
