so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is