if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
These Are 23 Of The Most Uncomfortable Questions You Can Ask
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
The 17 Most Horrible Things Said To Online Daters
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.