My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
wow bdsm is so cute
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
