I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
