dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
