normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
