I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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