Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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