we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
