HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I stole a fireplace last night.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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