at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Randomize
