I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
