What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
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