We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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