yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
