Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
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