yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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