Buhtt sex?
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
should my penis look like a turkey
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
you never un-have a 4some
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
