i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
