The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Randomize
