i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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