dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo