hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
