There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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