If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
