i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
it hurts more in the daytime
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
No subtext here. People are naked.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
