There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
