I think i peed on brittanys purse
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize