even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I need moral support for this bender
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
