im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize