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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
