are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize