Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
