wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
